I’ve had my share, and maybe more, of members who are so assured of their own righteousness that they see nothing wrong with trying to wrench me from my testimony. I marvel at whatever thought processes might lead a person in authority to treat one of their flock as a wolf. I’m fortunate to be one of the most stubborn people around. Push me and I stand my ground.

I remember one time when I showed up at Church as a youth, not having been there for three years. No one knew me, but I bore my testimony and promised I was there to stay, like a prodigal son returning home.

A member of the high council followed me to Sunday School class and asked for the floor. The teacher gave it to him. He preached a mini-sermon reminding everyone, particularly me, that the prodigal son of the parable was welcomed by his father, but that he had no inheritance coming to him. If I hadn’t already promised God, I would have walked out and not come back. (more…)

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Impending Disaster

It has been a rough couple of weeks for me, but it began over a year ago. I wrote about it on another post on another blog, Thud and Blood. The short version is that I went ATVing on some trails near Sandy, Oregon and wound up face down in the dirt with my leg bleeding.

On Wednesday evening, November 3, 2010, I was sitting at m laptop working on the billing for my work, which was due on Friday. I felt I was getting sick, like a flu of some kind. I couldn’t remember coming into contact with someone who had the flu, but in my work, you never know. (more…)

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If you are reading this and you are not I, then I have changed my mind and decided to let you read it. Many years ago, I decided to “out” myself and talk about my life dealing with same-sex attraction as a faithful and believing member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, and as a committed husband and father. That first time I wrote about it I was terrified. I could no longer hide comfortably in the proverbial closet. Since that day, I’ve been relatively unafraid to be honest with my feelings and my struggle, not only with same-sex attraction, but with life itself. Today, I think I’m more scared to post this than I was to first talk about same-sex attraction. (more…)

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I had a wonderful opportunity this last week of traveling along the coast of Northern California with a close friend of mine. It was wonderful to spend time with a friend and laugh, as well as share some special experiences. Among those special experiences that will live forever in my memory is the sacred silence of the redwoods… (more…)

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Envy and Strife

Few things are more destructive to healthy living than envy. Envy seems such a general thing that it’s hard to apply to it the usual Latter-day Saint cultural assignations of seriousness. You know what I mean. We like to know how much more serious one sin is than another. (more…)

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There is are many things that I dearly love about the temple. The peace and serenity that is there for one thing. The fact that silence is accepted and indeed encouraged. The warmth and kindness of ordinance workers who recognize the need for a comforting hand on the shoulder. In all of these things as well as everything else that happens in the temple, the central figure of it all is Our Lord. (more…)

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Sacramento California LDS temple

Sometimes family relations are not the picture of peace and tranquility that we  wish they were. Sometimes it can be downright ugly and people can wind up hurt. So what can one do under such circumstances? Go to the hills. (more…)

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Like Lambs Shall They Still in My Bosom Be Born

In many hymnals, there are usually up to four verses printed between the staves. Before the modern hymnals that we’ve grown accustomed to, the music for the hymn tune was printed above and all the text was written beneath the staves and there was no text between the staves. It is always my fond yet very seldom realized hope that we sing the entirety of a hymn and not just what’s between the staves when there are more verses. Often times, it becomes an entirely different experience when we look at what is beneath the staves. (more…)

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Peace Attend Thee

I’ve been thinking a lot about a favorite song that has been a part of my family tradition for at least three generations. It is a lullaby from Wales called Ar Hyd y Nos. It’s probably known more by it’s English title All Through the Night. (more…)

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As part of my work as a music director for a Lutheran church, this last week I’ve had a unique opportunity that scared me but which I ultimately found rewarding. Vacation Bible School. (more…)

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Sacramento River

I moved to Sacramento in February. Since then I’ve discovered a lot and found myself getting accustomed to various aspects of the area. Most notably, the river. (more…)

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Before My Back Got Old

Earlier this week, I celebrated my thirty-third wedding anniversary, married to the lovely, talented, and magnificent former Miss Barbara Wade. I’m fortunate to have found whom I consider to be the best woman on the planet.

I often get a chuckle when someone describes a very minor accomplishment, and someone sarcastically replies, “And they said it couldn’t be done.” In the case of my marriage, “they” actually said that. (more…)

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Today is my birthday, and I’ve probably had more well wishes from people from my past than ever before. I’ve loved it. The internet is a wonderful thing. Facebook gets the credit for me being remembered by so many. I won’t tell you how old I am, but some of you know. I don’t want to be a downer and such a great day, but there’s something on my mind today.

(more…)

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Sometimes there are days when we just want to let go, and give up. Some days we feel like we’re all spent and can do no more to further our own progression or the work of God. But then there are the days that the love which never lets us go reaches down and reminds us of where we came from and how much he wants us back. And it is often through loving friends both seen and beyond our mortal sight that he meets our need. (more…)

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My wife and I recently returned from a trip to California to visit our daughter, her husband, and their children. My grandchildren are all beautiful and sweet. I wish we lived closer. Our other grandchildren who live close to us are also wonderful. We get to see them more often. We get to see our other children more often. (more…)

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